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Stanley Stole My Shoelace
and Rubbed it in His Armpit

by Barry Louis Polisar

Stanley stole my shoelace and rubbed it in his armpit
And that's not all you know what else he did?
He took my mashed potatoes and he lumped 'em on his spoon;
Then he threw 'em cross the room. He's not a nice kid.

He never does his homework; I've never seen him read.
He always takes my book bag and says its his.
I know he is lying when he says he's smarter
Than my grandfather 'cause nobody is.

He tried to grab my pencil and break it in two,
So I filled his lunch box up with salt;
And that's the reason I was sent to the office...
As you can see it wasn't my fault.

Copyright by Barry Louis Polisar

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