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I Sneaked Into the Kitchen in the Middle of the Night

by Barry Louis Polisar

I sneaked into the kitchen in the middle of the night,
And I found a chocolate cake and I cut it with a knife.
Twelve pieces I did cut. Eleven of them I ate,
And one by one, there was almost none left upon the plate.

But before I finished eating, I saved a little slice
To give to my baby brother, 'cause I am very nice.
I crawled back upstairs and got my brother out of bed,
And quietly I whispered and this is what I said,

As we walked real quiet down the bedroom stairs,
With Tommy sucking his thumb and hugging his teddy bear.
I said "Quick, quick Tommy, look what I found!
Shhhhh! Be quiet and quickly gulp it down."

Just then we heard a thump and a clumpity clump clump clump.
We knew it was our mommy and in the darkness we all bumped.
Then the lights came on and I heard her say,
"Blah blah blah blah," in her special "blah blah" way.

"Who finished up the cake? Who's the rotten kid?"
And since Tommy had the last piece, I said, "He did!"
She looked at him and saw that his face was full of crumbs,
With chocolate flavored icing on his nose and on his thumbs.

I went back upstairs as my mother yelled some more,
"Blah blah blah blah" just like before.
But I knew it wasn't right; Tom was just a kid;
So I told her that the cake was eaten by my Uncle Sid.

Mommy looked surprised. Then her face turned red,
And I bet you know exactly what she said.
She said, "Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah
Blah blah blah blah blah!"

Copyright by Barry Louis Polisar

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