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I Don't Brush My Teeth

by Barry Louis Polisar

I don't brush my teeth; I never comb my hair
I wear the same socks everyday and I don't care

I never have to clean my room. I never change my shirt
I like my pants the way they are; ripped and caked with dirt
I wash my hands on Sunday. Monday I change my clothes
There's lint stuck in my belly button and dirt in between my toes

I ride the bus to school each day, everyone makes room for me
I like to shower twice a year to help me socially
My teacher never calls on me, she's so afraid she'll faint
She says my grammars good enough, but I'm almost sure it ain't

Take a whiff if you want to; come close if you dare
But I don't brush my teeth and I never comb my hair

Copyright by Barry Louis Polisar

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